Being authentic
What authenticity is, why it matters, and a simple three-step practice for living it.
Authenticity is a term we often see thrown around, especially in the context of personal development and growth. But what does it really mean to be authentic? Why is it important? And how can being authentic benefit our lives?
Being authentic is invaluable, as it is the only value that by itself allows us to build genuine relationships with others. When we are authentic, we attract people who appreciate us for who we are, rather than people who are drawn to an image we have created. Authenticity lets us connect with others on a deeper level, and build trust and mutual respect.
It also matters because it allows us to make a difference. When I am true to myself, I am more likely to pursue the things that are truly important to me, rather than trying to live up to someone else's expectations. That lets my life be governed by a purpose that is infinitely larger than I am. And when I am living a life of purpose, I am happy and fulfilled.
When I am inauthentic, I find myself living a duality. Pretending. And running a pretense comes with a cost: I am robbed of my own self-expression.
So, to everyone reading this, I want to suggest a simple three-step process.
- Make a list of the places where you are, were or have been inauthentic. This by itself takes a lot of courage and introspection. You need to be straight with yourself about being inauthentic. If you find yourself unable to see such areas, seek coaching.
- Tell the people affected by your inauthenticity that you're aware of it, and that you are now giving it up. This is the most crucial step. It requires you to face the impact of your inauthenticity with others. When people see that you are present to the impact, they start relating to you as an authentic person. This is the key to living a fulfilled life.
- Do this exercise on an ongoing basis. It is not a one-time thing. You need to keep looking out for such areas.
The intention is to be free to be child-like in your life. Have you noticed that all children are fountainheads of energy? That's because their power is not yet crippled by being inauthentic.